Raiders of the Lost Blog
-written by John Keefner, baaaaah.
There are two different types of people who write blogs. There are people like Mark, who wait entire months at a time between posts, even when good, equally busy friends bail them out and buy them a few extra days to get some dang thing onto paper. And then there are people like me who plan an entire year in advance. This is a list of blog posts I prepared so that I could have a full years’ worth of topics available before starting. The important thing is that I had a plan, not that I didn’t use it. Enjoy.
1 Nicknames - I need a good one
2 Brought a knife to a gun fight
3 Science bully
4 Part time professional
5 People who have a life after I leave
6 When semantics do matter
7 I only read the classics to have fancy quotes
8 Logging for the environment
9 Hello, welcome to hatshrapnel. I love you.
10 Vampires, kill ‘em all. And unicorns.
11 Learning to live in the upcoming pre apocalypse.
12 How to win friends and influence people, a guide to messianic fervor and martyrdom.
13 The secret diaries of a nonpracticing gringo zen master, all is revealed!
14 Columbian masked wrestlers
15 Football, that’s the round one, right?
16 Car salesmen, realtors, telemarketers and other professional career choices of Satan worshippers.
17 Environmentalists are against electricity, travel, and eating food. Oh, wait that’s not true. In fact they just hate people. Cha chunk, let’s conservate.
18 King of the hikers.
19 Hazy crystal ball
20 John - Impaired on life
21 Seventeen pedestrians were struck during the typing of this post.
22 The whiz quiz OR how I knew all that not drinking and taking drugs would pay off eventually.
23 A wise man once told me something that was very, very stupid.
24 Where are all the clues?
25 Death will just have to wait
26 Mark-ditty my M-dawg
27 The ethical hiearchy of need.
28 I’m only anal 78.6 percent of the time.
29 The internet, that great big thing in the sky run by magic.
30 Written in front of a live studio audience.
31 Mark, able to calculate the 13 millionth prime number in a single bound.
32 Put the Blog away before I take it away.
33 Keefner’s Rough Riders
34 Now you know why I used the qualifier ‘practically’.
35 I want a nice hat but am concerned for its wellbeing with so much hatshrapnel around.
36 Wyola, intradumentional vortex connecting Montana, Wyoming and Bangkok.
37 Scientists, menace to society?
38 The Return of Stickfigure Bob and the Last Crusade
39 This came to me in a dream
40 God, I love caffeine
41 How much do I have to make before I can stop picking up all those pennies?
42 Confessions of a political spy…the time I taped Newt Gengrich for the Democrats
43 Walking softly with a big stick, Teddy you were a genius
44 Don’t be a fool, you idiot!
45 John vs Shatner, ok I’ll take on Nimoy instead.
46 Idaho, land of sweet freedom and relatively expensive unibomber cabins. My new home.
47 The Catholic Vengeance squad, it is the little Inquisition that could.
48 Do the Hustle! Do do do do do duh do do do do do da.
49 There is nothing to fear but fear itself and Y2K
50 Behold! Bask in the magnificent opulance of the the Mark and John Special, the new karioki spectacular!
51 All my headlines inspired by God…or at least I didn’t do ‘em.
52 End of the year flashback. Or how I learned to relax and love the Hatshrapnel.
I really feel like my life would be unfulfilled if I never heard about # 3. Is this a poll?
Yes, I will write for any topic that anyone bothers to make a comment on.
Of course we all know you are just buying time.
I hate to admit it but I was curious about 21.
Oh, and 30.
…
And 44.
Hush.
Mark where are you, John seems to be doing all the work.
I want the prequel to 38… and of course 38 a short time later.